Darla's Dash of Salty Grace

Life is full of goods and bads, bigs and littles, the predictable and the come-at-you-from-out-of-nowhere kind of things. But no matter what, we have total control over how we handle any and all of it. We can respond or react. We can let life deal with us, or we can deal with life. Most of the time (nobody's perfect) I do my best to respond with what Bible calls 'salty grace' (Colossians 4:6) which is to say and do things the way Jesus would. This blog is my salty grace to you. -Darla

Friday, September 27, 2024

For Such a Time

Thousands and thousands of people like John and I, have traveled to Branson, Missouri to see the Sight and Sounds Theater’s production of “Queen Esther”. I know this because I’ve seen dozens of pictures and comments from you—my family and friends—on social media, and because I follow the theater's social media page. I also know that no one has had anything but good and great things to say about the experience. There’s a reason for that.

The reason, however, isn’t because of the high level of professionalism among the actors/actresses—although it could be. Nor is it the elaborate sets, lighting, and special effects that captivate you and make you feel as if you are part of the show, even though these things are true. No, the reason your ‘Esther experience’ touches you so deeply is because of one simple word. Truth. And truth has a way of digging in and taking root.

This isn’t some made up, make-believe story. The events are true. Esther, aka, Hadassah, was indeed an orphan raised by her loving, fatherly cousin, Mordechai. It is also true that Esther was chosen from among countless young women to become the queen of the Persian Empire. Furthermore, Mordechai most certainly did save the king’s life by exposing an assassination plot against him. And last and by far, not least, Esther’s position was not a coincidence or stroke of luck. It wasn’t even because of her beauty and humility. Esther was chosen to save the Jews before even one of her days came to be (Psalm 139). Her beauty, humility, and everything else woven together in this series of events were tools God used to carry out HIS plan for Israel.

Here’s the thing, though. Esther isn’t the only one ever born for ‘such a time as this’. The Bible is full of people who were born to be at just the right place at just the right time for just the right reason. But that’s not even all there is to this story—God’s story.

There is still much work to be done. There must be, because the earth is still turning and we’re still here. And because God, speaking to/through Isaiah said that he created mankind to give Him glory and praise (Isaiah 43:6-7), and because Jesus’ last instructions were to share the Gospel with the whole world (Matthew 28:18-20), we need to understand that this is our time.

We are here…we have been called to be the Esthers of our homes, our neighborhoods, our churches, schools, workplaces, communities, social media pages, and wherever else we have a measure of influence. This time is our time. Our time to speak out, stand up, set an example, be a genuine and accurate reflection of Jesus, and to be graciously, unapologetically, and lovingly bold.

I recently read this simple, yet profound statement: “We were not saved to be silent”. Being un-silent isn’t always a matter of speaking out loud. We can be un-silent in word or deed. In attitude and actions. But we are here for such a time as this—troubled and angsty as these times are—because God knows we are capable of handling it. He knows because he created and equipped us for the job. The question is, though, will we accept the position we have been called to?

Be salt and light,

Darla

Who am I?

I’m Darla Noble—Author, Speaker, and Ghostwriter with over thirty years of experience. I am known for being a great storyteller, but not merely for the sake of telling a story. The stories I tell are a) true and b) they always have a takeaway, i.e., a life lesson meant to help you be a better version of yourself.

I’m Darla Noble—wife, mom, nanna, and a little ‘oldish’ lady who loves Jesus, her family, playing in the dirt, walking…walking…and more walking, riding bikes, eating popcorn, roast beef, Mexican food, reading, and watching old sitcoms.

What do I write?

Inspirational nonfiction—Christian devotionals, books that spark the creativity in every mom and nanna’s heart, and one that breathes new life into the art of being a good neighbor and reminds you of why it matters.

Historical nonfiction—WWII and family memoirs.

Character Education & Family Fun—Books that use science and scripture to teach positive character, scavenger hunts of all kinds that are both educational and FUN, and write-in journals for tweens and teens.

What do I say and who do I say it to?

*WWII hands-on display and presentation based on “All My Love, George…Letters from a WWII Hero”. The presentation consists of brief reading from the book, an interactive time of Q&A, and time for participants to view and examine a variety of WWII memorabilia including George’s original letters and medals.

*Keepsake In The Making Classes, using the book, “Please Pass the Memories” as inspiration, the class consists of exploring and brainstorming fun, creative, and interesting ways we can use your family’s keepsakes, recipes, photos, stories, and even traditions (YIKES) to bring past, present, and future generations of your family together. Everyone needs and wants to have a sense of who and where they come from, and the Keepsake In The Making Class is the perfect way to do just that!

*Women’s ministry events/conferences/retreats. I offer several programs that are easily adaptable to fit your needs and timeframe. Workshops for each one are optional. Programs offered include: “Jesus and Zinnias Make Me Smile”, “Deuteronomy 6 Parenting”, “Please Pass the Memories:, “Love, Momma D; Getting to the Heart of Parenting From the Heart”, and “Sippin’ Tea With Jesus”. NOTE: I am also happy to speak on a topic/subject matter of your choosing.

*The Nanna Subscription—an easy, but oh, so fun mini-class which equips Nanna, Gma, Granny, Mama, Mimi, or whatever name your grandkids have for you, with EVERYTHING you need to engage and connect with your grandkids on a regular basis. No matter how young or old they are, no matter how many miles separate you, no matter how many grandkids you have, no matter…anything!

*Brighten the Corner Where You Are” is my newest book as well as the focus of an event I offer to individuals, community chambers of commerce, neighborhood organizations, HOAs (Home Owner Association), church groups, and anyone else interested in reviving the art of being a genuine friend and neighbor. Participants will discover (or rediscover) the value of kindness among neighbors, and of having a small circle of people you can count on and who can count on you…no matter what.

*Fun with science and a few illusions, “The Sneaky Banana Lesson (plus 26 more)” is a character education program for ages 5 to 15. This event is engaging, interactive, and overflows with life lessons young people relate to and that will make them want to be a little better and stand a little taller.

*If you don’t think it’s possible to have fun teaching math, science, verbal skills, ordering, rational thinking, and grammar, social skills, and team building, think again! “The Medium-Sized Book of Scavenger Hunts” event gets kids up and about, inside and out, talking and listening, and learning on the sly. This event is fun for classrooms, parties, family events, social gathers, team building, and lots more.

Fees for events vary. For more information, questions, or to book an event, CONTACT ME at dnoblewrites@yahoo.com, on Linkedin (Darla Noble), or on Facebook (Darla Noble).

Where can you find me?

My books are available worldwide via Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or directly from me when you email me at dnoblewrites@yahoo.com. You can also request any title from your favorite brick and mortar bookstore.

Saturday, September 7, 2024

When Vulnerability Equals Credibility

A few days ago, I had the honor of being a guest on a national podcast. The subject matter: how to handle the empty next thing. The podcast host, Erinn Kennedy-Heldt, and her husband are new empty-nesters, so one of the first questions she asked was, “How? How did you handle the change after pouring all those years into being a mom?”

My answer: “I got it right most of the time, but I bungled a few things. And when I say I bungled them, I mean there were times when things were really, really ugly.”

From there the conversation went in two or three different directions—mainly about what you need to try to teach your kids before they fly the coop, and how hard (but necessary) it is for parents to stop parenting and be ‘just’ Mom and Dad.

The biggest problem with making this transition is that neither the parents nor the kids really know how to make a clean break, so it usually ends up going something like this…

It’s incredibly difficult and counterintuitive for parents to just let go. After spending all those years being hypervigilant about keeping your kids safe, healthy, and provided for, you are expected to slam on the brakes, turn off the engine, and walk away. And your kids? Well, these young people who have reached the magical age (in years) of adulthood view this milestone as their rite of passage to do what they want, when they want, however they want, without your advice, input, or interference…until they want you. And when they want you, it almost always means they are in over their heads and need you (expect you) to fix it. Whatever ‘it’ is.

“We’ve already experienced that,” Erinn said, “but what do you do? You want to help them. You want to teach them. But you can’t be a doormat.”

I agreed. And then I said something which I had been trying to find the words to say for the past several years but for some reason, they just never seemed to come to me. And suddenly, there they were, coming out of my mouth like it was no big deal. But it was a big deal. A really big deal, because it’s what I, along with every other parent desperately need our adult children to know.

Here’s what I said:

“We need to just put it out there—to make ourselves vulnerable to them. Because when we do, we become credible, too. And here’s what I mean when I say, ‘putting it out there’. Tell your kids you know letting them go is the thing to do, but that they can’t possibly understand how hard it is to let go—that it goes against everything they have done since the day you were born. Follow that up by telling them you are sorry for the mistakes you are going to make, because rest assured, you will make them. Next, tell them that it has been your joy and privilege since the day the day they were born to be on 24/7 duty to keep them safe, fed, clothed, healthy, entertained, educated, protected, disciplined, and loved more than they can ever imagine. Then finally, remind them that during all those years you have extended to them grace upon grace, mercy upon mercy, forgiveness upon forgiveness, and more patience than you ever imagined you could, so…you would appreciate it if they would pay it forward a bit. If they would show some grace, mercy, forgiveness, and patience in this process, everyone would be better for it.”

Whew! That felt so good, because like I said, these are the things on every parent’s heart when their children leave home. Trust me.

So, whether or not you and your kids are just now taking those first steps into this season of life, or you’ve been walking…teetering…staggering…or whatever along this path for a while, these are the two take-aways from what I said.

Parents, you’ve done your job. It’s time for your adult children to use, discard, or put on hold all that you instilled in them. It’s their choice, not yours, so don’t try to make it your choice. This isn’t to say you cannot or should not be there for them, but now it’s an invitation-only event. Oh, and don’t think that agreeing to disagree means you failed as a parent. They have minds of their own just like you do. And above all, make sure they know with their whole heart that you love them with that unconditional ‘just because you’re my child’ kind of love.

Adult children, if you have children of your own, know how hard it is to be a parent and that there’s no such thing as doing it without making more than a few mistakes. You now realize that there is no way on God’s green earth the day will ever come when you no longer care, worry, wish you could take the brunt of their heartaches, or stop them from making mistakes even though you know it’s part of the growing up process. You also know that you never stop wanting the best for them, will always do anything in the world for them, and that you love them forever and always more than life itself. So please don’t begrudge your moms and dads for being who they became when ethey gave you life.

In other words, parents and adult kids, be golden to each other, i.e., treat them the way you want them to treat you.

Love,

Momma D